When one says “the fans at Joe Louis threw more octopi on the ice than the Wings put pucks in the opposing net,” one tends to feel weak, feeble, and like hockey really isn’t all that important of a sport, anyway.

But when 4 octopi hit the ice, each of which is gloriously twirled by arena manager and local deity Al Sobotka, you know we might be okay. Combine that with our record of scoring 3 goals whilst Jimmy is in net and Z as our Captain, and you have an OH MY GOODNESS I CANNOT BELIEVE WE’RE UP 2-1 ON CHICAGO.

What did I tell you? Nothing you didn't already know in your Red hearts: The Detroit Red Wings can beat this team. Chicago is good, but not the invincible juggernaut some claim they are. Not by a long shot.

What you just witnessed was a scene from Rocky. I know Chief over at A2Y kind of has the market cornered on awesome Rocky references, but I need to steal this one. Before Rocky and Apollo fight for the first time, Apollo comes out clowning around as if his victory is assured. He got in some shots at Rocky and looked to be in complete control, but then Balboa absolutely drilled him and down went Apollo Creed. He got right back up, but the look of horror on his face said it all. He had asked for this. He had thought it would be easy, but he was in the ring with a guy that could hit him harder than he's ever been hit before.

Now what is Detroit going to do with this new life they’ve earned?

More after the jump:

Ah.  What a game.  

Twig will be here soon with a recap, but until then, let's not let Dan McNeil forget that Detroit just smoked his precious Hawks just one day after writing this:  

The Blackhawks are too fast for Detroit. They're too deep. The Hawks are much more experienced, especially at the blue line. They're too well conditioned. Chicago is too everything for a Wings team that appeared out of gas after going a full seven games against Anaheim in the first round...

Enjoy these not-so-spicy Wings, who are nothing more than an annoying impediment that won't take long to remove.

Today, Detroit was too everything for the punk-ass Hawks and their bandwagon fans who didn't make a sound.  So take a moment and remind Dan how much Detroit just "hammered" the Hawks - his Twitter handle is @DanMcNeil670.  

LGRW

The Wings looked tired and asleep for much of game one.  They didn't have that fire in them and Chicago didn't do anything to light it. Until now.  

Want some lockerroom board worthy material to fire them up?  Here you go, from the Chicago Tribune: 

Of all the players from last night’s failure that could be talked about in a non-positive light, I would think that Howard would not be one of them. I would be wrong, though. Sure there are some fans out there who don’t really know any better. They see the other team score and want to blame the last guy to screw up, meaning the goalie. But I didn’t expect to see a report on that very subject written and published for the world to see.

More after the jump:

I don’t care what happened tonight, the Chicago Blackhawks are completely beatable. Detroit shot themselves in the foot all night long and Chicago got every single bounce. They are so beatable.

More after the jump:

Much has been made of our struggles in this year of strife. We watched Chicago run away with the division title, Western Conference top seed and, by virtue of Bestern/Leastern Conference Logic, the President’s Trophy. But we dared not deem this a year to “rebuild.” This is a year to re-arm. Re-load our arsenal. Led by Captain Z and Pavel the Magician, an unrelenting, undying fight has been instilled in the core of our youth. Now it is time to test that resolve in the ultimate rite of passage, best of seven (or race to four, as Babs would say) against the Stanley Cup favourite Chicago Blackhawks.

And for those of you who are fans of theatre, what better opportunity to see the Hawks’ stars than in their newest playbill: Chicago on Ice!

To the surprise of absolutely no-one, the best defensive forward in the league was again nominated for the Selke.  Per NHL.com: 

Patrice Bergeron of the Boston Bruins, Pavel Datsyuk of the Detroit Red Wings and Jonathan Toews of the Chicago Blackhawks have been named the finalists for the 2013 Frank J. Selke Trophy.

Here's the league's blurb on Datsyuk: 

Datsyuk, 34, was a point-per-game scorer while managing a plus-21 rating, and he accomplished it all by averaging 20:10 in ice time per game, the most he's played since the 2009-10 season. He tied for the League lead with 56 takeaways, and his 30 blocked shots were second among Red Wings forwards.

Pretty crazy to think that Datsyuk's second on the Wings in blocked shots. 

Bergeron and Toews are great players, but if you ask any player who's the best, they are going to tell you Datsyuk, no matter who is picked by the idiot sportswriters.

Remember the last time these two met? 2009 WCF? 

I do.  It gave us some great memories. 

Like Franzen treating Kane like the child he is:

And Helm showing the world how you kill a penalty. 

Hit the jump to see why that series has a special place for NOHS: 

Another game 7 against the Ducks; another glorious finish. As the Ducks went through the handshake line, you almost expected the teams to throw punches over the grueling series, but they're all professionals and wouldn't stoop to such nonsense. Besides, that's what social media is for.

Satire after the jump: