About N.O.H.S.

The Nightmare on Helm Street is a fledgeling blog overwhelmingly dedicated to the Detroit Red Wings and the destruction of their enemies. Drew started a non-partisan blog in 2008 which failed miserably and he eventually created N.O.H.S. on the scorched Earth thereafter in July 2009. Chris was added as an author three months later. Both are washed up college hockey players, except Chris is a stupid goalie.
Pointless Preview: 12/14 vs Phoenix Coyotes E-mail
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Written by Andrew   
Monday, 14 December 2009 11:47

Category #1: Our Very Existence is a Conflict of Interest

 Phoenix: The NHL actually owns the franchise right now after Gary won his dispute with hated rival Jim Balsillie wherein Balsillie tried to move the team to where it would actually make money.  A team that plays in the very league that owns it, hmmm… 

gary_bettman_thismuchphx

 Detroit: Gary Bettman hate us, everyone knows that.

 Winner: Phoenix 

Category #2:  Attendance

According to ESPN’s numbers…

 Phoenix: Average attendance: 9,825 (30th in the NHL) 56.1% capacity.

phxemptyrink 

 Pathetic.

 Detroit: Average attendance: 19,127 (6th in the NHL) 95.3% capacity. 

jla4

 What many would like to call a “half empty house” is actually quite misleading.  Though the team’s struggles along with an even more struggling economy has taken its toll, the Wings are still in the top ten as far as attendance.

 Winner: Detroit 

Category #3: We’ve Won a Play-off Series in the 2K Decade 

Phoenix: Ask the people of Winnipeg the last time this team won a series in the Stanley Cup wpglogoPlay-offs. 

Detroit:  Let’s see: 

2000: Beat Los Angeles

2001: Who cares?

2002: Beat Vancouver, St. Louis, Colorado, and Carolina (won the Stanley Cup)

2003: Who cares?

2004: Beat Nashville

2005: Ask Gary how this season went

2006: Who cares?

2007: Beat Calgary, beat San Jose

2008: Beat Nashville, Colorado, Dallas, and Pittsburgh (won the Stanley Cup)

2009: Beat Columbus, Anaheim, and Chicago

 

Winner: Detroit (the real losers are the good people of Manitoba and my heart goes out to them)

 Category #4: Google Image Search [Team Name] + #1 Fan

 Phoenix:

balsillie2

 Aww…well at least he used to be.

 Detroit:

 kidrock

Kid motherf***ing Rock

 Winner: Detroit

 Prediction: Wings win by the same score as the last game I gave away my tickets (DAL) 4-1.  Keep it simple.  Keep it stupid.



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